I came across a story that stayed with me. It was tender, funny and sparked off reflections about nurturing leadership qualities in others.

A young boy had a wild idea for Halloween and instead of dismissing it, his father offered something rare. A safe space where imagination could take root.

What unfolded wasn’t just a costume made of “fart-coloured tulle,” but a moment of growth, creativity, and quiet confidence.

It reminded me how powerful it is when we hold space for others to explore, to try and to shine. Much like the way we can nurture emerging leaders by believing in their spark before it’s fully formed.

The story was shared by the boy’s father, Andrew Ritchie, who wrote about his six-year-old son’s desire to dress up as a “big brown fart cloud.” Rather than saying no, he gently challenged his son to figure out how to make it happen.

Over four days, the boy worked with brown and beige fabrics what they affectionately called “fart-coloured tulle” and proudly wore his creation around the house. The father’s quiet pride was palpable: “He made it. He believed in it. And now he walks taller.”

This is what happens when someone feels safe enough to be fully themselves; quirks, clouds and all.

The Power of Psychological Safety

Harvard professor Amy Edmondson describes psychological safety as the belief that one can speak up, take risks and show up authentically without fear of embarrassment or punishment.

And it’s not just theory. In Google’s landmark study Project Aristotle, researchers set out to discover what makes teams thrive. After analyzing hundreds of teams, they found that psychological safety was the single most important factor in team performance more than talent, experience or even clear goals.

That is also my experience in my consulting projects with clients. When teams experience high level of psychological safety, it makes it easier for team members to contribute to the team’s success and growth.

The great news is that if your team isn’t experiencing this currently, here are 7 practical action steps that you can take to begin building psychological safety. These steps are designed for heart-led professionals/ business owners who are awakened and wants to lead with power and grace.

1. Model Vulnerability First

Share your own moments of uncertainty or learning. When leaders show they don’t have to be perfect, others feel safe to be real. Try this: Begin a meeting with a “highlight and lowlight” check-in. Share what’s going well and what’s been challenging. In the challenging, highlight what’s a learning insight gleaned. When my clients implement this at their workplaces, their team meetings soon became buzzing with energy and even junior members were comfy enough to share.

2. Listen to Understand, Not to Fix

Practice active listening. Reflect back what you hear, ask open-ended questions and resist the urge to immediately solve. Try this: Ask: “What’s something you wish you could say more openly here?” Then simply listen. In one of the Sunshine Inbox, I shared an example of a managing director who used to reply dismissively whenever his managers provided suggestions to his questions. As a result, no one felt safe nor motivated to share anything during the meeting. I coached him to change this non-useful habit of his and this created the needed environment for positive change. Week by week, his managers became more open to sharing.

3. Celebrate Curiosity and Effort, Not Just Outcomes

Affirm your team’s courage to try and the creativity in the process not just the end result.

Try this: Ask: “What did we learn?” or “What would we try differently next time?”

4. Invite Questions Without Judgment

Create space for people to ask “why” or “what if” without fear. Questions are signs of engagement, not defiance. Try this: Say: “There are no silly questions here. What’s on your mind?” Our clients are often surprise at the level of candid responses and suggestions that my team and I are able to elicit from our pulse conversations and sessions with their team members. Inviting questions without judgement is one of the factors in providing a safe space for others to share.

5. Use Language That Includes Not Excludes

Avoid jargon or insider terms that create distance. Speak in ways that invite participation and clarity. Try this: Replace “You should have…” with “What might we try next time?”

6. Acknowledge Emotions in the Room

Psychological safety includes emotional safety. Notice and name what’s present for example, tension, joy, fatigue without judgment. Try this: Say: “I sense there’s some heaviness today. Let’s take a breath before we begin.”

7. Lead with a Growth Mindset

I shared about Growth Mindset in Sunshine Inbox Week 36. Research shows that leaders who embrace a growth mindset; believing abilities can be developed foster more psychological safety. They encourage learning, experimentation and resilience. Try this: When someone struggles, say: “This is part of the process. What can we learn from this?” When someone succeeds, affirm the effort: “Your persistence really paid off.”

It’s easy to associate psychological safety with leadership and teams but its impact reach far wider. Sometimes, we pour our energy into creating safe spaces at work, yet forget that our most intimate relationships with our family, friends and partners need that same care.

Whether we’re leading a team, raising a child or holding space for a friend, psychological safety is the soil where growth begins. It’s not about shielding others from discomfort.  

Imagine what shifts when a child knows they can ask questions without shame. When a partner feels safe to express doubt or dream out loud. When a friend knows their vulnerability won’t be met with judgment but with warmth.

The 7 action steps we explored earlier (modeling vulnerability, listening to understand, celebrating effort, inviting questions, using inclusive language, acknowledging emotions and leading with a growth mindset) aren’t just leadership tools. They’re life tools. They help us build relationships that are resilient, honest and deeply nourishing.

So this December, as we reflect on how we lead, let’s also reflect on how we love. Let’s be the kind of people who make others feel safe to be fully themselves. At work, at home and in the everyday moments that often go unnoticed such as a passing comment, a quiet check-in, even a brief exchange with a stranger.

Let’s be the kind of leaders in our world who celebrate fart-coloured tulle and the brave little souls who dare to wear it.

PS: The boy in the story? Neighbours love his idea and he started taking commissions. 😊